What not to wear...and that modesty thing

Lately I have seen tons of things floating around about modesty.  What it is, what it's not, what a woman's responsibility is.  To be honest, this is a topic I have struggled with my whole life.  My sweet and wonderful parents had multiple rules about what I could and couldn't wear.  I also have rules about what my girls can and can't wear.  But they are still little and this topic will become more prevalent and pressing as they grow.

I believe that modesty and clothing simply come down to what is in the heart.

"Do not let your adorning be external-the braiding of hair and the putting on of gold jewelry, or the clothing you wear-but let your adorning be the hidden person of the heart with the imperishable beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which in God's sight is very precious."   

1 Peter 3:3-4 (ESV)

I love this verse!  It is the verse I go to each time I am faced with what to wear or not to wear.  I ask myself simple questions.

1.  Why am I wearing this outfit?  Am I seeking the attention of man?
2.  Is there any part of my body that no one but me should see exposed?
3.  Will others see Jesus when they look at me or my clothing/body?

I think 1 Peter 3:3-4 brings to light a very important point about modesty.  God looks at our heart.  At the same time 1 Corinthians 6:19-20 states,

"Or do you not know that your body is a temple of the Holy Spirit within you, whom you have from God?  You are not your own, for you were bought with a price.  So glorify God in your body"  (ESV)

In this passage Paul is specifically addressing sexual immorality.  When we dress to please men are we thinking about sex?  Probably not.  But we are seeking men's attention?  Obviously!  I don't think God is glorified when we expose our bodies unnecessarily.  I think we are choosing immorality.  We are specifically commanded to 'glorify God in/with your body'.  How we present our bodies to the world is a reflection of God because we are His creation, in His image.

My desire as a mom is to teach my daughters to respect themselves so much that they don't need to dress to get a guy's attention.  I want to cultivate beautiful, Jesus loving spirits in them so they understand the difference between dressing to look attractive and dressing to get attention.  When I see girls dressed with everything exposed I am saddened.  Sad because I realize that they must not have a very accurate view of themselves.  Sad because they don't realize their beauty isn't in there breasts and behind but in their spirit.  Sad because they view themselves as a sex object even if they don't realize it.  I want my girls to realize they are of great worth in God's sight!  I want all girls to realize that same thing!

All this rambling to say, it isn't really about what is in your closet.  It isn't about whether you wear a 2 piece or one piece swimsuit.  It isn't about spaghetti straps or sundresses.  It isn't about short shorts or Bermuda shorts.  It's about your heart.  Is your clothing detracting from other's seeing Jesus?  Are you making yourself the object of man's attention when you and other's should be focusing on Jesus?  AND when you look at other's dressed in a way you think is inappropriate how are you responding?  Is your spirit still gentle?  If it is your jurisdiction to correct are you lovingly guiding or are you condemning?

I have rules regarding clothing for training purposes only.  One day my daughters will have to choose for themselves what to wear.  My prayer is that I will have taught them not a set of clothing rules but a desire to honor and reflect Jesus in everything!  Even their clothing and hair!