Lately I have seen tons of things floating around about modesty. What it is, what it's not, what a woman's responsibility is. To be honest, this is a topic I have struggled with my whole life. My sweet and wonderful parents had multiple rules about what I could and couldn't wear. I also have rules about what my girls can and can't wear. But they are still little and this topic will become more prevalent and pressing as they grow.
I believe that modesty and clothing simply come down to what is in the heart.
"Do not let your adorning be external-the braiding of hair and the putting on of gold jewelry, or the clothing you wear-but let your adorning be the hidden person of the heart with the imperishable beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which in God's sight is very precious."
1 Peter 3:3-4 (ESV)
I love this verse! It is the verse I go to each time I am faced with what to wear or not to wear. I ask myself simple questions.
1. Why am I wearing this outfit? Am I seeking the attention of man?
2. Is there any part of my body that no one but me should see exposed?
3. Will others see Jesus when they look at me or my clothing/body?
I think 1 Peter 3:3-4 brings to light a very important point about modesty. God looks at our heart. At the same time 1 Corinthians 6:19-20 states,
"Or do you not know that your body is a temple of the Holy Spirit within you, whom you have from God? You are not your own, for you were bought with a price. So glorify God in your body" (ESV)
In this passage Paul is specifically addressing sexual immorality. When we dress to please men are we thinking about sex? Probably not. But we are seeking men's attention? Obviously! I don't think God is glorified when we expose our bodies unnecessarily. I think we are choosing immorality. We are specifically commanded to 'glorify God in/with your body'. How we present our bodies to the world is a reflection of God because we are His creation, in His image.
My desire as a mom is to teach my daughters to respect themselves so much that they don't need to dress to get a guy's attention. I want to cultivate beautiful, Jesus loving spirits in them so they understand the difference between dressing to look attractive and dressing to get attention. When I see girls dressed with everything exposed I am saddened. Sad because I realize that they must not have a very accurate view of themselves. Sad because they don't realize their beauty isn't in there breasts and behind but in their spirit. Sad because they view themselves as a sex object even if they don't realize it. I want my girls to realize they are of great worth in God's sight! I want all girls to realize that same thing!
All this rambling to say, it isn't really about what is in your closet. It isn't about whether you wear a 2 piece or one piece swimsuit. It isn't about spaghetti straps or sundresses. It isn't about short shorts or Bermuda shorts. It's about your heart. Is your clothing detracting from other's seeing Jesus? Are you making yourself the object of man's attention when you and other's should be focusing on Jesus? AND when you look at other's dressed in a way you think is inappropriate how are you responding? Is your spirit still gentle? If it is your jurisdiction to correct are you lovingly guiding or are you condemning?
I have rules regarding clothing for training purposes only. One day my daughters will have to choose for themselves what to wear. My prayer is that I will have taught them not a set of clothing rules but a desire to honor and reflect Jesus in everything! Even their clothing and hair!
Dear Laina,
Four years ago today you entered the world. You weighed only 5lb 1oz and you were feisty! You still are :). I didn't really get to see you the day you were born because breathing wasn't your favorite thing to do so you were whisked away to the NICU. You would be there for the next 8 days...they told me it would be longer but you are a fighter! You surprised everyone but Daddy (who said you would come home that day)!
You are still small in stature but big in personality. You make everyone who knows you smile. You flash your sweet smile with your dancing brown eyes and people fall in love. You are stubborn beyond measure. I pray that Jesus uses that for HIM. And I believe He will. You are my middle child, my child who desires control. As you grow I pray you let God have that control as you learn to serve and seek Him.
You are so very loved little girl. You have my dark eyes and olive skin. You have Daddy's tenacity and drive to complete tasks. You are everything a mama could want in a daughter. You and your sisters and brother are my dream come true.
Laina, you changed the course of my life. I worked full time for the last time the week before you were born. God used you to draw my heart into our home. To increase my desire to live for Him, my desire to fulfill Proverbs 31 His way for my life. He has used you to break my will and soften my spirit. Your name means 'path to grace'. God has used you in your 4 short years to show ME the path to grace. I hope and pray He uses you the same way in other peoples life.
Happy Birthday, Laina! I love you!
Mommy
Early this spring my mom and I were talking about the goodness of God. About what it means that God is good. Our general consensus was that we didn't really know how to separate the goodness of God from the kindness and compassion of God. So I began praying that God would show me what it meant that He was good.
As I meditated on the thought of God's goodness, Psalm 34:8 began coursing through my mind!
"Oh, taste and see that the Lord is good!"
How in the world does one taste goodness? So I began to pray that I would taste the goodness of God. Soon afterward a sweet friend helped me plant a garden. A garden I wouldn't have been able to plant without God's provision of this friend. And I began to see that God allows us to literally TASTE His goodness.
Look at Genesis 1. When God creates the plants in verse 11 He follows it up with 'it was good'. He knew then that the food was good. Then in verse 29 He gives man the good creation for food. His creation is good and we can actually physically taste it!
Part of me wonders if the use of artificial coloring and flavoring so much of the food on the market has prevented us from connecting food with God's goodness. When you bite into a bowl of cereal it is satisfying but not the same way an apple is. As I have walked this journey of discovering the goodness of God, I have discovered I crave very different things. First I crave more of His presence but also my attitude toward eating is different too. When I take a bite of my meals often my first thought is thankfulness for God's goodness and provision!
What an awesome God I serve that He would provide good, nutritious, life sustaining food for me and my family. I am so thankful that I can taste the goodness of God!
After months of battling frizz and unmanageable hair I decided to go 'no poo'. To be perfectly honest some days I think I'm crazy but my hair is super happy! I am so thankful for the internet so I can figure out what to do with the mop on top of my head!
So if you are wondering this is what I am doing. About 3 times a week I wash my hair with 4 ounces of water mixed with 1/2 tsp of baking soda. I scrub it in and leave it sit for about 2 minutes. Then I rinse with 8 oz of water mixed with a TBSP of red wine vinegar (and lavender essential oil). That sits for another 2 minutes before washing my hair out really, really well!
The result has been super soft, manageable hair that has WAVE!!! And only washing 2-3 times a week is a major bonus. I know it sounds crazy but it also saves TONS of money! My oldest is even washing her hair this way and loves it! Hopefully I will convert my whole family :)
I will try to post a pic later!
Several months ago my awesome little sister told me I should start blogging. Well, here goes nothing. I can't guarantee you will find anything exciting. My desire is to constantly point to Jesus in all I do. In my life with my children and husband, in how I manage my home. I have so very far to go but am still loving the journey!
My hope is that I can share with you some of the fun things we do, the fun things we create and how we love Jesus as a family!
